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Self-awareness is an evolutionary 'poison' by design - humans are wired with a sense of self that attaches to concepts and people, even though reality is fundamentally chaotic, entropic, and indifferent.
“Our birthright is the horrific qualities of self-awareness, a poison, but that we as almost magicians or alchemists can transmute into gold, into art, and beauty and wonder and love and all that.”
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The human condition is a multi-hearted paradox - the ability to perceive existence creates immense dread and awareness of loss, yet it is the only mechanism that allows for the creation of meaning and wonder.
“The paradox of self-awareness, in my view, is that self-awareness, self-consciousness, self-apprehension is the most horrific, terrifying thing in the known universe. And yet, it is the most beautiful thing in the known universe.”
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The only way out of hyper-reflection is through it - once the 'can of worms' of self-awareness is opened, there is no returning to a state of naivety; peace requires moving forward to embrace uncertainty.
“You can't return to some form of yourself, some version of yourself that hasn't already wondered, questioned, pondered, or become concerned about those sorts of things... the best way to deal with those sorts of cans of worms or those tunnels is forward, not back.”