Fans rage when artists use AI even when no job exists
“The other day, I fucking I posted a picture of a frog that I AI generated just because I wasn't able to get the frog to do what the fuck I wanted to do in real life. Like, I want the frog holding frog popsicles. He was being difficult, so I had to fucking use another guy. And everyone was blasting me like, yo, not you. Not you. I can't believe you used AI. They were like, yo. You're taking away opportunities from other artists. Well, let me just clear this up. I wouldn't have hired you no matter what because I do all my artwork anyway. There was no job to be taken away.”
Mitzi Shore made young comics follow legends to test them
“Mitzi Shore, that lady right there. When if you were coming up, one of the things that she would do is like young comics that she thought of any any promise at all. She'd put them on after monsters. That's your spot. Right on after the killer. Good luck. Good luck, motherfucker. She knew what she was doing. I mean, she's the most important figure in comedy outside of comedians, for sure.”
The great flood story persists because tsunamis felt apocalyptic to isolated cultures
“I think the story of the flood's a real story because it existed too many cultures. And tsunamis tsunamis fucking happened, dude. And if they happened and you were in that area, you would think it's the end of the world because you don't have contact with people in Europe. You don't have con you know, you don't have contact. So wherever you are is an apocalypse. You think it's the whole world's gone.”
Top scientists keep vanishing under suspicious circumstances
“Don't top doctors go missing. Don't top physicists go missing. They go bye bye. The best heart surgeons on Earth, seven of them were on the same fucking plane that went down. The best whatever whatever. They just found the cure for cancer. These 10 doctors, they're on a p j to fucking who the hell knows where, and they go down. It's just crazy that all these top doctors and top thing and physicists and that just like these people just disappear.”
Action Bronson got his car stolen in his underwear buying a Dutch
“Two two kids jumped in the car and just dipped. And you were in your underwear? I was in my underwear. I had a fucking I had to make the police report in underwear. Then why are you in underwear? First off, that was the first question. Why are you in underwear? I said, should I take them off? You want me to take them off?”
Sanitation workers deserve top pay before any tax hike
“Out of all the fraud that's existing in that city, all the waste that they've showed, that is one thing you should fucking pay people for because the job sucks. And it's super necessary. You fucking have to pick up the garbage goddamn it. Pay those fucking people. And for people to go, oh, it's an unskilled job. That's a backbreaking job. You're slinging around bags all day and picking up cans and yanking on levers. It's also dangerous. You're hanging off the back of the truck sometimes.”
Mexico City elevation gives you superhuman cardio at sea level
“There's like 10,000,000 people that live in the place they told us not to go to. Yeah. They told you, oh, listen. I was like, what the fuck is this massive area here? He's like, yo, don't go there. But 10,000,000 people live there. And I was getting that good lung capacity. What an advantage you you would have if you lived up there, and then you go down to sea level, you could fuck everybody up. Your cardio would be off the charts.”
Carlos Ulberg knocked out Yuri while fighting on a torn ACL
“That's a world champion. That's how you really become a world champion. You have a blown out knee and you find a way to KO a guy who's this wild, aggressive, awkward dude, you know, and he's coming after you. You got a blown out knee, and you just bink perfect fucking left hook. Torn ACL, they're carting you off the fucking field. Everyone's crying that their career is over in football. This dude's fucking knocking homie out for the for the light heavyweight championship.”
Kill Tony gives comedians a real career path that never existed before
“Kill Tony, which is, like, this awesome platform for them. There's so many people that came in. It gives people legit opportunity to get on stage and either to get on YouTube or to get on Netflix in front of the whole fucking world, and it could make your career. Comedians see there's a path. All I have to do is, like, keep doing open mics, put together an act, start getting a little road work, do Kill Tony, and then next thing you know, I'm headlining on the road. You could really make a living and have a real career in comedy.”
Mike Tyson warned never speak badly about yourself — your subconscious believes it
“Mike Tyson told me to never speak bad about myself because my conscious doesn't my subconscious doesn't know whether I'm joking or not. Yeah, I think he heard that from fucking Bruce Lee, though. I'm not gonna lie. I heard Bruce Lee say that on some shit recently. There's something true to that, for sure.”
