StarCraft Cheese Academy
from: StarCraft Cheese Academy
Space Camel and Professor Phi
PUBLISHED: AUG 9, 2024INDEXED: APR 30, 2026, 9:12 AM

Episode 5: Cannon Rush, "Black Hole Feta"

Quotes & Clips

8 clips
StarCraft Cheese Academy
Aug 9

Cannon rushing wins by outsmarting, not outplaying your opponent

People can't rush because they know you hate it. That's why many people do it. When players are cannon rushing other players, they're not trying to really you're really not trying to out micro the opponent. You're just trying to outsmart them with a, unseen tactic. You're not trying to actually fight a fair fight, which is why everyone hates it so much.

Battling Bard - former pro wrestler, StarCraft player
StarCraft Cheese Academy
Aug 9

The first cannon's only job is protecting the second cannon

And then the first cannon isn't there to do anything except protect the second cannon. That's why I think it's two two steps ahead.

Battling Bard - former pro wrestler, StarCraft player
StarCraft Cheese Academy
Aug 9

Insulting a cannon rusher only encourages them more

So if you're playing someone and they're cannon rushing, there's no point in insulting them because they know exactly why they're doing it. Every time you insult them, they get a kick out of it even more because they know they're getting under your skin. Don't encourage them.

Battling Bard - former pro wrestler, StarCraft player
StarCraft Cheese Academy
Aug 9

Tim Ferriss won a Wushu championship by exploiting weight-cutting rules

This really famous guy, he's got a really good podcast, Tim Ferris. He got dared to enter a Wushu, tournament in China. Wushu is the Chinese martial art. So he looked at the rules. So he looked at the rules, and he also thought about playing with strengths. So he's not good at wushu. He doesn't he can't flip. First rule is if a competitor falls off of their platform three times in the competition, they're disqualified. And the second rule was they did the weigh ins 24 or maybe even more, like, more than a whole day before the actual event. So he dropped a whole bunch of weight and then weighed in, and then as soon as done that, started eating the the salt and the water and the starches and bulked up. And sure enough, he wins the tournament.

Battling Bard - former pro wrestler, author
StarCraft Cheese Academy
Aug 9

Against Zerg, you must kill the natural before it finishes

The big the big idea with cannon rushing Azure is you have to kill the natural. Because if you don't, well, you're too far behind on tech. But to kill the natural, they have to build the natural. So if you can rush too early, and you put a can within range of the natural right away, they'll see it coming up as the natural is complete. And then they'll just cancel the natural build one somewhere else.

Battling Bard - former pro wrestler, StarCraft player
StarCraft Cheese Academy
Aug 9

Cancel cannons strategically to waste opponent's mining time

Anytime an opponent sends up more than four SUVs or five SUVs and they've gone down to the natural just to kill that pile on, Sometimes, I'll say, okay. Well, fine. But I'll lock out those SCVs with a wall of, pylons and then just cancel the cannon when I feel like, okay. They've been down there long enough. So you lose the cannon rush, but you kill a lot of their mining time. And then they're so usually, they're so tilted and, like, they're confused about what's going on.

Battling Bard - former pro wrestler, StarCraft player
StarCraft Cheese Academy
Aug 9

Cannon rush is salty feta cheese — a black hole of frustration

Feta. It's feta because it's the saltiest. It gets the most salt. People get the saltiest cheese, I think. A black hole. The black hole feta. Because it leads to so many different things. It sucks you into this dark place. Doing it sucks you into a dark place. Losing to it sucks you into an even darker place.

Battling Bard - former pro wrestler, StarCraft player
StarCraft Cheese Academy
Aug 9

Removing cannon rush would make early Protoss games pointless

Protoss doesn't have much going on in the early game. For the first two and a half to three minutes, Protoss really doesn't have anything. You really don't have anything. So I almost always not always not always, but almost always start my games with a four. Because diamond players know how to beat the cannon rush, but you have to have at least that threat of a cannon rush to buy you enough time to actually do something good.

Battling Bard - former pro wrestler, StarCraft player

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